I don’t know what it is, but I think I’m depressed… I don’t even like myself anymore, I don’t want to bother anybody because when I was a kid suffering from bullying (and I still do suffer from it) my mother told me that nobody wants to hear my shit, and if I continue acting sad and whatnot, everyone will run away..

I don’t think I have anybody to turn to, maybe I’m right.

Everything I do blows up in my face, I can never succeed.. I can never get things done, even if I work at it.

I don’t know what to do, I don’t even have a mind of my own because when I state my opinion on a subject, I am usually scolded and eventually called stubborn, rude, and selfish (by my mother). I can’t even wear what I like.

I’ve been crying all day because I keep reflecting on my past, it haunts me everyday. I’ve been crying all day because I am bullied and nothing has been done. I’ve been crying all day because I can’t even get anybody to answer the questions that I ask, or even respond to my statements.

Everyone ignores me, I must have done something wrong… I probably deserve it. But all I know, it hurts…

A lot.

TO ME ON THURSDAYYYYYY!

Dude, so who wants to hear the story?!?

Lets go:

Thursday we went to a museum, field trip actually… and then to the Pier to go and eat and look around enjoy ourselves whatever….. and at 1:00 I went on a boat, and at 1:15.. ish I noticed the time and asked them when are we coming back, and they were like: 2:30 and I flipped out because my bus leaves at 1:30. Yeah, that is really bad. And I asked the boat people (No, it wasn’t a ferry, just a harbour boat) to turn back around. They refused because they said people had paid, and I mentioned how they can accomidate for the other people by just turning back around and starting over again. They refused.

I called my aunt to call the school to get my teacher’s contact. She did so, and told them what happened. I then got my teacher to call me and I told her. She found out I was okay and said she had to go back to the school because she wanted the other kids to get there on time. She also mentioned how she is calling her friend who can pick me up and drop me off home. Eventually she said her friend had an appointment and may not be able to get there.

Okay, so my aunt called my mom and my mother got really mad at the school. She had to come to the school to figure things out, the school LIED to her saying that I was not allowed to actually go on the boat. When my mother heard it, she said to them that she would rather hear my side of the story, it is unlike my daughter (me) to do something like this. Besides, you guys (school) will do anything to save your name. They went quiet.

It took her an hour and a half to get to the destination. She asked me what happened, I told her. When I came back to school the next day, many people asked how was the ride, asked if I was scared, and some other stuff.. This contradicted what my previous spanish teacher had to say.

This is what she said:

1. The parent who was with us saw me come on at 1:15.. I say why didn’t he stop me?
2. Said I should say sorry to my teacher and to the principal.. I say, okay to the teacher, not okay to the principal.
   The people who I told this story to said I should not.
3. For a smart person, she is surprised to see that it was me. I was irresponsible. I say, yeah I was wrong for going on the contraption. I was right for notifying the school.
4. I forced parents to come pick their kids up because the kids were late for their busses. I say, my mother had to go pick me up, it took her an hour and a half to get there. She lost over a hundred dollars in overtime, she usually comes home at 9… Sometimes we don’t have food for a month.
5. I should not have went on if I didn’t get a reply when I asked about the length of time. I say: yeah, she’s right. A lot of people said that they were wrong for leaving a minor at a place to defend for themself.

The kids at school were cool with it, and my teacher (previous) made it seem as if people were upset. Some of them were concerned, it was shocking to me that people even knew my name. Nobody likes to be around me… That’s why I was alone when I was at the pier. The first time I came down here for a field trip, these girls who were supposed to stick with me said to meet them at this area. They were not there, so I walked around disney by myself… Then when I found some people that I knew, they told me “too bad for you” when I asked them if I can be with them. This happens to me a lot, ever since I was a kid people didn’t want to be around me. I guess I shouldn’t have went.

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This was fun, personality test by the way a person draws a house…